An anonymous mom echoes the thoughts that many other moms may be having. She writes:
I am the mother of an amazing 4 year-old boy. For sometime now, I have noticed that he is ‘different’ from boys of the same age. It didn’t bother me at first, because his interests were also different from these boys. But as time went on, I started to feel anxious for him when I realized that he preferred most things ‘girly’ – girls’ toys, clothing, etc – and also preferred to play with girls at school, etc.
I have read up a lot on this subject, and have mostly read that it’s ok for boys to be interested in girly things – dress-up, toys,etc – that most boys will have a time of doing this, but that it does stop. My son is also sensitive, quite emotional, and often says that when he grows up he’s going to be a girl! He notices my clothes and comments that they are beautiful; he likes to pick flowers and give them to me; he loves the color pink; likes “my little Pony” and loves fairies and princesses too!
On the other hand, he does play with cars and trains, loves kicking a ball and playing with a ball in any way – throwing, bouncing, etc. He loves adventure and playing ‘fighting’ with his dad – rough and tumble, pillow fighting, etc. So there are elements of ‘he’s such a boy’ in him. However, I do wonder how it’ll be when he grows up?
My husband and I have a stable and happy marriage. My husband is great with our son, and for most of the time everything seems great. But then something will happen, or our son will say something, and I get this chill inside me that says, “That’s not normal boy behavior.”
I wonder whether I should prepare myself for my son one day announcing he is gay, or is this normal for boys, and all will be ‘normal’ when he reaches adulthood?
I wonder what other homosexual men were like growing up, do they remember doing things that were ‘different’ from other boys? Did they realize from early on that they were different? Is there a common thread, or common things that they did as little boys, that, looking back at now, fit in with them being gay?
I guess what I am looking for is reassurance. Reassurance that he will be fine – develop into a healthy, happy, well-balanced man who will have a wife and a family of his own.
In future posts we will present ways to help boys with such tendencies to develop into healthy, well-balanced men, prepared to be great husbands and fathers.
In the meanwhile, dear reader, do you have suggestions for this mom?